“These kids are driving me crazy and no one is helping!” This or something similar has crossed many a mom’s lips. When things get to be too much, often the ones in mom’s direct path take the brunt of the frustration. The way a mom deals with stress can affect her kids.

Stress can be both good and bad. When we respond favorably in stressful situations, we learn to cope with the event and go on. A positive attitude keeps us looking for the bright side of the situation. No matter how long it lasts, it won’t last forever.

Distress is when stressful situations turn bad. Instead of directing our frustration in the direction of the problem or seeking someone to listen, we make our kids the target. Moms don’t set out to do this, but high stress has a way of making us act in a manner that is not the way we normally act. This doesn’t mean that moms don’t love their children.

Kids are visual people. They learn by watching us. If our attitude is negative they will pick up on it.

Kids sense changes in the climate of their home. This includes a change in a mother’s temperament. When mom gets angry, kids know it. If children are used to seeing their mom smiling and laughing, hearing her get angry or shouting can frighten them. They may run and hide.

Whenever mom is like that, kids will turn away. They may learn to shut down themselves if they think that something they say or do will cause mom to get this way. When stress causes a mom to lash out at her kids, they may believe that they are the cause of the anger.

Stress can lead to impatience. Moms can become impatient with their kids. If mom is going to be late for work, she may rush a child to finish their breakfast. Slow eating can lead to mom getting upset or the bowl being left on the table with food still in it. Kids learn to be impatient with others. Moms may notice this when they see their child playing with its siblings. The child will rush others or snatch toys away even if it makes the other children cry.

Moms who are stressed can stress out their children. But if they manage stress in positive ways, they will teach valuable lessons to their children. No matter what situation arises, the way that a mom acts towards her children is important. Children will always scream, holler and cry even when things are going well. Separating the stressful event from the behavior of the children gives them security that mom’s love and care doesn’t change at these times.

No doubt about it, stress affects kids. When mom is stressed and it shows in her behavior towards the kids, they learn to become guarded. Stress management is important to maintain a healthy relationship between you and your children.

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Eat better, move more, and believe in yourself!

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